More of You

As I head back into exams and try to make some final decisions about study abroad, I’ve been trying to seek God for guidance. It’s really difficult hearing everyone’s plans for the next year while I am still figuring it all out. Since it’s been my non-midterm week, I have had trouble finding motivation to get ready for next week. To fully enjoy my fellowship’s retreat this weekend by not having to worry about work, I should have gotten up early to do it instead of sleeping in. (Rest is always good, though). So, I’ve been feeling guilty since I know this next week is important as I try to make academic improvements with my future in mind. God gave me this song today that perfectly embodies what I am going through, and I just lift it up as my prayer.

You by Hillsong United

Invading all my weakness
You wrapped me up in grace
The worst of me succeeded by the best of You

My heart is overtaken
My soul is overwhelmed
The worst of me succeeded by the best of You

My dreams have found their purpose
My future in Your hands
This life would have no meaning if it weren’t for You

So I lay me down
For Kingdom come
Steal all that is within me
Cause all I want in this world is more of You

[Chorus]
And the less of me it is You
Increasing as I fade away
Your life for all the world to see
God It is You who breaks the chains
It is You who lights the way
And everything I am cries out for You

Lord make me more transparent
Your life in mine displayed
And let every earthly glory
Go back to You

So I lay me down
For Kingdom come
Steal all that is within me
Cause all I want in this world Is more of You

[Chorus]

____

Amen.

Decisions, decisions

“If you do it, you’ll regret it. If you don’t do it, you’ll regret it. Either way, you’re going to regret it, so you might as well do it.”

That was the first quote to come to mind, especially since it was ever so-useful last semester during a similar time. I had a midterm following a weekend retreat, and I was having a lot of trouble deciding whether to go or not. That quote helped me decide to go, and it was a great decision Same for this week. FALL RETREAT is coming up this weekend, but I have a paper and midterm next week. If I look at my situation objectively, I should not go. However, I definitely base a lot of my decisions on feelings, so I guess that “F” in that personality test was right. I’ve been looking forward to this retreat, and I’m definitely going. God has also blessed me by giving me a week of no major grades or busyness so that I can get ahead with that work. He’s great

I felt like I should probably put up on my blog that I officially declared my major today. Biology is going to be hard at times, but He will help me through. Also, it turns out that the advisor I picked solely on her research topics I found online I’ve heard is a really nice person. I also prayed over my choice that if she were the best for me that she’d take me, and He answered! What a blessing, and I guess a big day? I’ve pretty much known I’d be a bio major since before college, so doesn’t seem like such a big deal…now it’s almost time to make some final decisions about study abroad and figure out classes for next semester. What joy. God, guide me as I make plans so that I may follow your will for my life. Amen.

Where’s Waldo?

God is really funny sometimes.

Thursday was completely crazy and tiring because of a series of events that involved literally running around. Summary of the day: prayer, running, eating, skipping, realizing, exam-ing, more skipping, more running and more prayer. What’s important to glean from that list is that I lost my key during my run and only realized it an hour before an exam. I said a quick prayer for my key, and continued on with my day. It wasn’t a dire situation, but during the exam I noticed that a storm was coming, forcing me to skip a part in my schedule to search for my key before the downpour. By the time I borrowed a sweatshirt, He had cleared the storm. Blessing #1. I started on my second run of the day. After reaching the halfway point, I realized that it was more difficult that I thought to find a golden room key since all of the leaves were golden and the ground was shiny because of the rain earlier. I stared at the ground on my walk back to campus, but to no avail.

However, as I was walking/running, God spoke to me. I happened to play my Christian music playlist during this second run, and that’s when He got funny. He seems to do that a lot, using my shuffled music to speak to me…”You make all things work together for my good” -Your Love Never Fails by Jesus Culture=I knew losing my key wouldn’t be an impossible situation, and the events of the day had some reason for happening. ”We will keep our eyes on You” -Mighty Fortress by Christy Nockels=I had been staring at the ground that whole time, looking at leaves that all looked the same, searching for that precious key. I tried with all my might, but I couldn’t. It’s just like our daily lives. I may seek the world for answers, depend on my own strength to succeed, or be tempted by what the world has to offer. But, I need to focus on God. He will be the answer. “Let me lift up your face; Just don’t turn away; Why are you looking for love, Why are you still searching as if I’m not enough? To where will you go child? Tell me where will you run? To where will you run?” -By Your Side by Tenth Avenue North. I had been literally running around and staring at the ground, trying to find that key on my own, but I just needed to run to Him. I need to lift my face to Him knowing that He will provide.

At that point, I loved how God used the dumb mistakes I made to teach me more about Him. What I thought was a trivial moment in my life, He used it to amaze me. Blessing #2. But there’s more. I proceeded to call for the police to open my door since my roomie wouldn’t be back until late and she didn’t respond to my text. It was too late to get a replacement key, so the police were on their way. No more than 10 seconds after I hung up, my roomie walks through my dorm’s front door. I canceled the request and saved money. Blessing #3. I finally got in my room, and as I went to shower, I realized that the key had been hiding in my shorts the whole time. (awkward, I know, please ignore) What could I do but laugh? What I had been looking for the whole day had been with me the whole time. Blessing #4. Just like I found my key with me, I can find within me life’s precious treasure…the Holy spirit. Infinite blessings. He holds the key to my heart and to my future.

Jesus is the Key I need

To make it an even better story, the friend I had dinner with also had lost key issues and God showed up her too! I bet God got a chuckle.

God, thank you for using the little moments in my life to show me how much you care about every detail of my life. Thank you for watching out for me and teaching me how to live. I may get some bumps and bruises along the way, but I know that I can always run into your inviting, loving arms that will always catch me when I fall. Thanks, Dad.